


The Banana Lounge

by thebananahasspoken



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: 90'slingo, Alcohol, Anal, Blood, Bondage, Breeding, Choking, Collar, Dominance, Dragons, Drinking, Drugging, Enchantment, F/F, F/M, Foursome, Gloryholes, Gunplay, Humiliation, Knifeplay, Knotting, M/M, Magic, Male - Freeform, Multi, NSFW, Oral, Orgy, Reader-Insert, Sextoys, Snakes, Spanking, Spiders, Stripping, Submission, Threesome, Vaginal, Violence, ancientgods, andpuns, askbasedcontent, blowjob, bones - Freeform, brotheltype, cannibas, cum, deathmention, dickseverywhere, dubcon, female - Freeform, gasterbeasts, gendernuetral, intercourse, lotsofbones, mythmonsters, ohwegonhaveagoodtime, paytowin, public, rampantdebauchery, roughsex, selfinsert, sizedifference, skeletondicks, somanypuns, straightupfuckin', thebananalounge
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-10
Updated: 2019-05-17
Packaged: 2019-09-15 13:41:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 21
Words: 13,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16934298
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thebananahasspoken/pseuds/thebananahasspoken
Summary: Welcome to the Banana Lounge, the house of sin, whimsical fancy, and, for a price, love~ many a skeleton is at your service here, and await your company.





	1. In the Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Come in, my loves, come in <3 and enjoy the enticing wares we offer. The Banana Lounge, relocated from Tumblr, holds many wonders and desires~ All for a reasonable price. 5000g per skeleton, per night, for whatever purpose you wish.

* * *

rbssns asked: Could I get some 🍌?  

* * *

 

The air of the world shimmers around you oddly, as you step through what you had thought to be a wormhole in the street, your eyes blinded for a moment by the sun overhead. Before you, across the deserted street and well kept pavement, stands a large brick building, what you can only assume is a warehouse. In large, cheerful neon lettering, curving with a strange enticement across the entire front of the building, hangs a sign announcing the business to be 'The Banana Lounge'.

A lounge, then. An... interesting size, for one. Did it double as a dance club as well?

You shrugged your shoulders, looking up and down the quiet street for a moment before striding towards the lounge's entrance, a gleaming set of two glass fronted double doors with additional signs upon them, proclaiming that 'No Charas or Frisks were allowed. This means you!'. Scribbled in smaller, less neat lettering was the designation 'And no Jerrys either'. Odd, again, but you couldn't fathom the meaning, and let yourself into the building. It looked to be the only one in operation within sight, and perhaps whoever was inside could offer you some sort of guidance as to where you were.

The inside of the building, or what you could see upon your entrance, was pleasantly cool, and decorated like the waiting area of any business, several comfortable couches and chairs laid out before a large desk, complete with modern computer and inbox, currently empty. The air was heavy with herbal spice, coming from a small garden in one of the windows beside the doors, and in the wall across from you sat another set of double doors, solid and firmly shut beneath a veneer of sheer curtains. Beside the desk, and around an alcoved dip in the wall, was a large coffee stand, equipped with several machines, a large basket of pastries, and a giant stack of mugs, behind the desk stood an officious door inscribed with the lettering 'Director', and at the desk, watching you with rapt interest, sat a bespectacled woman with long, curly, dark red hair, her darkly painted lips pert with amusement and intrigue.

She inspected you in silence for a moment, tilting her head and tapping darkly painted nails against her jaw, before pushing herself away from the desk in her rolling chair and standing. She wore a pencil skirt that hugged her wide thighs and hips closely, a button up shirt done up not nearly high enough (you flushed at her brazenness, feeling like you should look away), and what must be heels, from the tap of her feet against the short-carpeted floor.

Her smile was wide and genuine, and her green eyes sparkled in the light from overhead, even as, from under the canopy of her riotous curls, a tiny skeletal face peered, cautious but curious.

"Welcome, dear, to the Banana Lounge! We have all the finest of comforts, and the finest company in the multi-verse~ Only five thousand gold to see who your only wildest dreams have conjured. I am Banana, only partially responsible for the name, I assure you... but please. Just call me B. So. Who are you looking to have join you today?" she crowed, obviously thrilled to have what she percieved as a customer, and you could only blink at her, slowly approaching the desk.

"I... really don't know what you're selling, Miss... B. Bananas? And how did I even get here? Why are you taking payments in gold? And how-" you began, your words spilling out faster and faster in your confusion, but B, with a raised hand and a kind smile, shushed you, sitting back in her chair and moving her raised hand to stroke under the jaw of the skeletal being hiding in her hair. It seemed to... purr, the lavander lights in its now hooded sockets transforming into tiny hearts.

"My love, it's not so complicated as that. This place... it's been designed to know it's customers simply from their desires. You see... this is a- well. What some may call a whorehouse. A brothel, I suppose. What we sell? Pleasure, and from those you have most longingly craved... monsters. Those fiendish beasts that consume your mind in the darkest hours. There is no way you could be here... if it weren't true. You'll find all your money has transformed to gold on your arrival here, there's no worry for that. So... why not indulge? Sate yourself. We welcome all sorts here... and ask only that you keep an open mind."

She had you there. You'd often dreamed of the monsters you so highly regarded... had lusted after in the dark of the night. And to be offered the opportunity to finally make those dreams reality...

You dug into your pocket, where, indeed, in place of your wallet was a sack of gold coins. Your gaze moved from B's shrewd smile to the box set on the corner of the desk she indicated, the slot on the top almost seeming to breathe. Your chest grew tight in anticipation.

"Well. Um... I guess I'll buy a... banana? From... Sans?"

B smiled broadly as she watched you drop five thousand piece coins into the box, reaching out to press a blue button among a sea of other colored keys on her keyboard. In the next instant, the double doors beneath the sheer cutaining opened, and through them strode... _him_. In all his slovenly glory, from his lazy grin to his pink, fluffy slippers. Comic smirked at you knowingly, one hand withdrawing from his basketball shorts' pocket, and beckoned to you, his phalanges clacking together quietly and his sockets crinkling with humor.

"c'mon, kid. no cents in standing around all day now that you've paid, hmm?"

You couldn't help the snicker that rose to your lips, glancing excitedly at B. She winked, shooing you towards the skeletal monster waiting for you, and it took no more than that to send you tripping across the carpet to place your hand in his, letting him guide you through the doors with an eagerness you were almost ashamed of.

Almost.

Comic led you through an enormous room with a high, crysalline star dotted ceiling, lined with comfortable, almost bedlike chaise lounges, coffee tables, veiled lamps, and a filled with a number of skeletal monsters that you couldn't even begin to count. Several made note of your passing with a wave, a smile, or a chortle, and Comic nodded his head at a few himself before he found an abandoned chaise in a secluded corner of the lounge, letting you sit first before, with a huff and a long, lingering look down your form, he dragged his knuckles along your jaw.

You shivered as his phalanges extended into your hair, as he bent to hover his bony lips an inch from yours... you barely noticed him lowering you onto your back, or him mounting your chest, his grin curving into lechery and the waistband of his shorts lowering under the curve of an intimidatingly girthy, glowing cobalt cock, nearly pressed to your panting lips.

His hold on your hair tightened. His sockets flashed, bearing the same heat as the one growing in your belly. He stroked his cock slowly, and a dribble of precum bubbled at the tip, sluicing over the fat heat and dripping onto your chin.

“banana was what you asked for, wasn't it… but nothin’ cums free. gotta _suck_ up to me a little better than that, heh. so open up, babe... and let's get started on the wildest night of your life.”

* * *

 


	2. Axe-ing the Right Questions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You're wondering about a specific monster...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is it not dark enough for you already?

* * *

Anonymous asked: I-is there an Axetale Sans here by any chance?

* * *

 

A good deal of the floor of the lounge is at the very least moodily lit, so as to avoid accidents and confusion; the bar was smokey, as was the smoke lounge, and the theater rooms were dimmed for movie viewing, but otherwise, most areas of the large building had more than adequate light...

But for one sectioned off alcove, marked by a single velvet rope, the pressing gloom, and a carefully written sign.

_'Beware. The monsters beyond the rope are Dangerous, and a liability form is required for entrance.'_

The dark didn't bother those within the shadowed section of the lounge a bit; most monsters had quite good night vision, a consequence of being forced to live underground for many centuries, and the skeletal beings prowling the dimly lit alcove reveled in their gloom.

The monster you sought could be found within the shadows, seated beside his brother on a suspiciously stained chaise, just within the alcove and across from a gleaming, glass topped bar. He regarded your approach, and your unsteady halt at the edge of the velvet rope, with apathetic, bored expectance, the mismatched magic in his shattered sockets throwing odd shapes across the edge of the bar. He tapped his bloodstained phalanges on the arm of the lounge, and cast you a darkly ironic smile.

“we’re _all_ here, human. why though? not enough dangerous folk here for you already?” he murmered, cynical and cool, before he waved a hand towards the rest of the darkened alcove. From within, cruel and mocking laughter billowed, sockets lit with homicidal, insane magic flaring into life.

Dust cackled from his seat on the edge of the bar, sharpening a knife and muttering to himself; Horror sneered from beside his gangling brother near a mounted, blood spattered boar's head, playing with the edge of his axe. Crooks waved brightly, but dropped his hand at a quiet order from his brother. Nightmare clung to a corner, burbling and seeming to only exude more darkness as he mused and fumed; Error, on an ungodly throne, twiddled his multicolored phalanges towards you, his smile tilted oddly and his gaze heavy with malice. Blood lay across a chaise entirely, his bulk causing the frame to creak, and pinned you with a look of absolute hunger, black and scarlet magic dribbling between his fangs.

Ice as cold as winter shot through your blood, every instinct in your body telling you to _run_.

Axe watched your reaction knowingly, snorting and pushing himself up from his seat. He emerged slowly into the light, but was no easier to look upon than his sniggering brethren, the old bloodstains splashed across the front of his t-shirt and jacket as stark as the mad grin splitting his shattered skull. The only thing remotely comforting about his appearance was the golden locket strung around his neck, but you... you couldn't seem to break your gaze away from his...

“plenty of avarice and evil already, without my fouling things up, don't you think? i honestly didn’t expect to be noticed. were you considering requesting me, little rabbit? heh... prey you change your mind. so much fresh meat about... i can't say you'd hop away from the encounter.”

His perverse laughter followed you all the way back to the front desk, where B had been watching after you with concerned eyes, ever since the moment you'd entered with your question.

"Are you alright sweetie? He didn't do anything to you, did he? I won't have that unless it's paid for and consented to, believe you me," she pressed as soon as you stepped back under the sheer curtains leading into the lobby, hands on her hips and eyes flashing, but you assured her, with a shaky laugh, he had only told you the score. More than fair, and too much for you.

...was that why your knees still shook, and your heart beat against the inside of your ribcage yet, your mind swirling with growling threats and unholy, dark tempations of forbidden, deadly pleasure?

* * *

 

 


	3. More than in Appearance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A brothel, you say...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You're more than a little right~

* * *

missfangirl-slightly-obsessive asked: 5000g? XD its almost like a brothel. But hey if it means a night being loved by a skeleboi *coughsanspersonalitytypescough* thats worth it! Hehehheehehehehgoshimsuchalonelypotatohehehehe ^^;

* * *

 

B giggles behind her hand, swinging back and forth in her office chair. She can't seem to help it, and excuses herself after a moment, shaking her head and stroking the spine of the miniature skeleton seated on the arm of her rolling chair (the tiny being arches and purrs contentedly, looking up at you with lazy, tired sockets).

"Well, honey... there's a reason it sounds like one. It kind of is? Slight difference, of course... none of these guys have to be here~ I asked them all to come, for the specific purpose of meeting those that have always longed for their company... among other things, hehe," she informs you with a wry grin, laying a finger beside her nose knowingly, before spinning towards her computer and consulting something on its screen.

She was silent for a moment, twirling a curl around one finger and biting her lower lip, before shooting you a glance and tapping six different colored buttons.

"Tell you what, sweetheart~ you go in there and take your pick of your favorite Sans personality. They'll be waiting."

B nodded you into the lounge, depositing your money into the fee box for you, and before your knew it, your feet led you into the cavernous room of the main floor, your eyes wide and sparkling as they took in the decor, the sumptuous, deep carpet (that would feel divine on bare skin, you knew it), the plush, large chaise lounges... the many, many skeletal creatures within the room, talking in small groups, playing games, drinking at the bar...

Looking at you, with an interest bordering on rabid.

You knew the monsters you jolted to a halt in front of, your heart leaping in your chest in recognition: there was Comic, with his lazy grin and his fluffy slippers, hands in his pockets as always; there was Red, broad shouldered and smirking, golden fang glinting in the overhead light (his smile only widened at your lingering glance towards him, sockets glittering knowingly); Stretch winked at you over the stick of his sucker, orange Converse untied and smile quirked habitually at one side; Mutt leaned one slim hip against the side of a nearby lounge, leather jacket studded with spikes and chain laden collar catching your eye; Lust was here too, one bared hipbone jutted out and heart-shaped gaze clinical as he scorched your form with his gaze; beside him, unlit cigarette dangling between his teeth and motorcycle boots crossed, G leaned a shoulder against an extension of the wall, cracked skull doing nothing to lessen the intense gold of his gaze.

Amused chuckles resound through the grouping at your wide eyed, awe-struck stare.

“oh, they’re _cute,_ ” Comic chortled, sending you a fond look as he shifted his stance, and Stretch, pocketing his phone, quirked a brow bone and jostled Comic's arm with his elbow. 

“hungry for attention too. b said as much~” he divulged, his grin curving in his playful teasing, and while your cheeks pinked, sudden shyness overcoming you at all the attention, G huffed out an appreciative breath, pushing away from the wall he leaned against and striding over to stand beside you. He lifted a hand to shift a tress of your hair from your neck, sending a shiver down your spine.

His smile was slight, but aware, and meant only for you.

“They’re in the right place for it.”

Lust, not one to be forgotten in any light, took your hand boldly and spun you in a circle, razing your body with yet another long, hungry look, the fur lining the collar of his vest moving in the disturbed air your twirling lent. He stopped you when you lay against his chest, ensconced in his arms, swept, literally, nearly off your feet by his attentions.

“i’d be willing to go half price for this one…” he purred, the hand not supporting your back tracing along the length of your thigh, but a scoff interrupted his flirtation, Mutt casting him a flat, unimpressed glare. He held out a hand imperiously, fully expecting you to take it, and you did without question.

“you'd do it for free and you know it,” he muttered in castigation, pulling you back up onto your feet and, in a moment of quiet observance, righting your hair where Lust had mussed it, and Lust pouted up at the much taller monster for a moment before brightening, sending you a wink and a shrug.

“heh… guilty as charged. hope you brought the cuffs.”

G, seeming to feel through his pockets for something (a tsk came from the lobby, and he stopped, looking grumpy for a moment), before sending Lust an exasperated look, folding his arms across his half-bared ribcage.

“Save it for later. They haven't even picked yet," he huffed, nodding his chin at you indicatively, and Red, letting out a warm chuckle, slunk his arm around your waist, smirking down at you suggestively.

"whataya say, sugar? who do ya want. go on... tell 'em," he rumbled, squeezing your hip and bending close to nuzzle against your ear ("we both already know, don' we darlin'...), and, biting your lip and pressing your thighs together, you whimpered under your breath, dropping your eyes and choking on your words at the sound of his deep chuckle, the smell of his cigars and peaking magic-

"oh, fuck off, red, how do you always know?"

You gaze rose to find the other monsters already leaving, Mutt pounding a half gloved fist against Red's and Lust slumping away in playful dejection (he mouthed 'call me' back to you, pressing the sign for a phone to the side of his skull and winking), while Red, triumphant and drunk on his victory, had eyes only for you (at least metaphorically), hand moving up your arm to grasp your chin, raise your face, and press your lips to his bony pair.

You could taste the alcohol on his breath, sharp as a knife and heady as his presence; it got you nearly drunk just from the taste of him, from the tangle of his tongue with yours... almost as drunk as the press of his hands, the pull of his phalanges at the button of your jeans. he only pulled back from your lips to shuck off your shirt, his breath as short and excited as yours, and met your eye meaningfully, smoothing one palm over your bare flesh and running the other between your trembling thighs.

"was never a question, was it baby doll?"

It really hadn't been, not in the least.

* * *

 

 


	4. Put Your G Where Your Mouth Is

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's no need to be shy~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We know why you're here <3

* * *

Anonymous asked: *slams 5000g on the table and looks over to G!Sans* Hi... >////< (absolutely love your writing btw! It's SO good!)

* * *

 

B flaps a hand at you bashfully, turning the slightest of pinks, before pressing a soft eggshell button on her keypad and waving you inside, looking on as her bitty bones attempted to gather up the spilt coinage.

"Thank you, and have a good time dear~ look for him around the smoking lounge, he likes his Camels. Keeps him collected. Cassy... Cas- Casanova! Honey, put that bag down, it's too heavy for you, let me help you," she chided the tiny skeleton, and he pouted up at her, but dropped the bag of coins obediently, his heart tipped tail swishing around his ankles meekly.

You snorted out a tiny laugh, shaking your head, before leaving the two at the desk and doing as you were bidden, ducking into the lounge and searching, among the many rooms, for the so called smoking lounge. There were a plethora of different offshoots around the main floor, from a game room to a fireplace lit study to a- an art room? that you passed by on your search, but eventually found the room that B must have meant, judging from the smoke hanging heavy in the air around the neat, peaceful room. A few pool tables stood away from the seating area, where a few skeletons were playing a game of billiards (it appeared that Mob and Shooter were hustling Papyrus out of his money, and unapologetically at that), and within the gathering of leatherbound chairs, well stuffed and worn comfortable with use, sat G, his gaze on the travel magazine in his hand.

He looked up at your timid greeting, an easy smile growing across his face, and blew out a long, slow stream of smoke, standing to welcome you with his cigarette hanging between his teeth and his magazine tossed idly to the side.

“No need to blush on my account, honey bunch. The party’s all about you, right? So indulge… let your hair down.”

One hand rose to tilt your chin up, while the other removed his cigarette. He bent to lavish your lips with a kiss, slow and sweet and smoky with nicotine, tangling his golden tongue with yours and pulling you into his embrace.

You barely noticed him divesting you of your shirt beyond whimpering at the removal of his lips from yours as he pulled it over your head, and arched into his grasp when he palmed your chest, loving and slow and sensual. He lost his jacket, too, somewhere in the mix of your breath and the stroke of his hands, and your nipples rub against his bare ribs, drawing a groan from both of you.

His soft laughter is soothing and teasing all at once, the glow of his magic rapturous as your pleasure. He pulled your thigh up the length of his with a firm hand, and ground his pelvis between the apex of your legs, tempting, offering the succulence of your flesh what ecstasy he could bring you with the hot, hard length of his own arousal.

“I’m gonna blow your mind, baby. So hold on tight… we’re going for a ride.”

More specifically, you riding him more wildly than you ever thought possible, and somehow rendering the stoic, cool monster speechless and breathless.

* * *

 

 


	5. The List

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For reference~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And intrigue <3

* * *

Anonymous asked: Do you have a list of Sanses, Papyruses, and Gasters that are available in the Banana Lounge?

* * *

Anonymous asked: What are the names for everyone, and who is everyone (who have you have names for)?

* * *

B shifted through her paperwork, tongue held between her teeth, before finally unearthing a long sheet of paper covered in scribbles, tiny chocolate handprints, and a smear of lipstick.

“Ah… here we are. Let’s see…”

Undertale- Papyrus, Comic (Sans), and Gaster  
Underfell- Boss (Papyrus), Red (Sans), and Ego (Gaster)  
Underswap- Blueberry (Sans), Stretch (Papyrus), and Bunny (Gaster)  
Swapfell- Raz (Sans), Mutt (Papyrus), and Scowl (Gaster)  
Fellswap- Black (Sans) and Money (Papyrus)  
G!Sans and G!Papyrus  
Dancetale- Dance (Sans) and Waltz (Papyrus)  
Mobtale- Mob (Sans) and Mafia (Papyrus)  
Mobfell- Shooter (Sans) and Lord (Papyrus)  
Underlust- Lust (Sans) and Crave (Papyrus)  
 **DEATH WARNING:** Horrortale- Horror (Sans) and Crooks (Papyrus)  
 **DEATH WARNING:** Axetale- Axe (Sans) and Spine (Papyrus)  
 **DEATH WARNING:** Axefell- Blood (Sans)  
 **DEATH WARNING:** Error  
 **DEATH WARNING:** Nightmare  
Undernight- Crescent (Sans)  
Fresh  
Ink  
Dream  
 **DEATH WARNING:** Dusttale- Dust (Sans)  
Reapertale- Reaper (Sans) and Scythe (Papyrus)  
Reborntale- Demon (Sans) and Angel (Papyrus)  
 **WARNING: MAY BE SUBJECT TO EXTREME HEAT CYCLES/ WILL BREED YOU:** Gaster Beasts- Fang (UT Sans), Claw (UF Sans), Slayer (US Papyrus), Butch (SF Papyrus)  
 **WARNING: MAY BE SUBJECT TO EXTREME HEAT CYCLES/ MAY BREED YOU/ POSSIBLE DEATH WARNING:** Beasttale- Bomberboy (UT Sans), Cherryboy (UF Sans), Ripperboy (US Sans), Hotboi (UL Sans), Towelboy (DT Sans), Loverboy (HT Sans)  
 **WILL BREED YOU:** Lamia (UT Sans), Hiss (UF Sans), Slink (US Papyrus), Slither (SF Papyrus)  
Dalliance- Blue (UT Sans) and Fell (UF Sans)  
Criminal Attraction- Sly (MT Sans)  
 **WILL BREED YOU:** Incubus (Sans)  
Hunter (Sans)  
Altertale- Honor (Sans) and Glory (Papyrus)  
King (Sans)  
Majesty (Papyrus)  
Cross (Sans)  
Professor (Science Sans)  
Outertale- Nova (Sans) and Moon (Papyrus)  
Wondertale- Cheshire (Sans) and Hatter (Papyrus)  
Birdtale- Sparrow (Sans) and Raven (Papyrus)  
Chesstale- Checkmate (Sans)  
Demitale- Shackle (Sans)  
Monotale- Nimbus (Sans)  
Inkfell- Blot  
Felltale- Steel (Sans) and Copper (Papyrus) **  
WILL BREED YOU:** Myth Monsters- Aranea  
Brim(stone)  
Anubis (Sans)  
 **WILL BREED YOU** : Drake  
 **WILL BREED YOU** : Aqua  
 **DEATH WARNING:** Grim (Horror G!Sans)  
Ash (Underfell G!Sans)  
The Don (Mobtale G)

…And Banana, since so many are interested <3

“And honestly, more come out of the woodworks every day. If you remember anyone I forgot, I’ll let you know if they were invited or not!” she chirped, sliding the list over to you with a perky smile. "Just remember that for any of the monsters marked with a death warning, you will have to sign a liability form. You'll know what you're getting into."

 


	6. The Boss' Right

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You've decided to spend some time with Boss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And he's ready to receive you.

* * *

Anonymous asked: *slides over 10 000 G to UF Paps* Three words. Fuck me hard.

* * *

 

B distractedly accepts your offering, dropping the notes through the magically widened slot in the top of the box before her with an errant hand. She seems to have been in the process of reorginizing her paperwork when you walked in, a great deal of old and new requests spread out across the top of the desk, and through it all waded Casanova, a large red stamp in his arms.

"I'm so sorry, my love, but I really can't uncover my page board under all this mess... could you let yourself in and find him yourself? He's usually hanging around Red, or pretending to be impressive while tasting wine. Just look for the cloud of egotism," she murmured, rolling up her sleeves and casting you an apologetic glance, and you shrugged good naturedly, waving away her worry and doing as she had bidden you, strolling through the propped open double doors and onto the main floor of the lounge.

It was all the same to you, after all. As long as you got what you had come for, you'd be satisfied.

It was fairly easy to find him, to be honest; he was impossible to miss, among the other skeletal monsters scattered about the chaises and padded recliners, the coffee tables and shaded lamps. He had a presence like few others possessed, commanding without question or demand, and when his gaze found yours, a slow, savage smile lifted his glower into knowing satisfaction and intrigue.

"AT LAST. I KNEW YOU COULDN'T STAY AWAY LONG."

He stood from his lounge with graceful panache, grand in his meticulously shined armor and pressed scarf, as crimson as the lights in his sockets (you followed the lines of the cracks that rose from the left, old battle scars, you knew), and rounded a table littered with car magazines, modern fashion, and a single, unopened condom to grasp your chin, turning your face this way and that in the low, ambient light. You kept still, even as your knees trembled and your heart pounded under the intensity of his inspection, even when one of his gloved claws traced down your throat to rest over your pulse.

He seemed pleased by what he found; his smile only broadened, a tinge of hunger to it now.

“ON ANY NORMAL OCCASION, I WOULDN’T ALLOW ANYONE TO COMMAND ME. YOU, THOUGH… GENEROUS AND STILL SUPPLICANT IN YOUR DEMAND… YOU, I WILL ACCOMMODATE.”

Before you could comprehend, and before your head could stop spinning, he'd spun you on your heels and bent you over the edge of a nearby lounge, your pants and underwear in shreds. One of his hands rested on the back of your neck, holding you in place and commanding obediance, while the other rose to his mouth, ripping his glove off to slather three phalanges with saliva, his tongue slipping almost sensuously along his long, clawed fingers. His undone belt buckle was cool against your ass, contrast to the intense heat of the long, studded dick pressed against your flesh, already teasing at your entrance.

“JUST REMEMBER YOU ASKED FOR IT.”

* * *

 

 


	7. Mutt's the Word

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mutt has something in store for you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And he's been hankering for it, believe you me.

* * *

Anonymous asked: 10,000 for the hound!!

* * *

 

B lets out a laugh interrupted by a snort, eyes coy and amused from behind her glasses. She twirls a lock of hair around one finger, sifting through the mounds of paperwork before her for your request.

"I have to assume you mean Mutt~ A very good choice. He's been getting bored lately, so he'll be glad for the interest. Just be ready for some roughness... that's how he rolls."

She looks like she knows from personal experience, if you can judge from her gentle blush and the bite of her teeth into her lower lip, but without another word she waves you in, shifting a few pieces of paper to press a rusty orange button on her page board while attempting to hide her flush behind the fall of her hair.

You find Mutt not too far into the lounge, leaning against an outcropping of wall and looking through his cell phone. He slides it into a back pocket at your approach, and tosses you a seedy, knowing grin, pushing away from the wall and sliding his hands into his leather jacket's pockets.

His spiked collar caught the light from a nearby fixture, reflected also in his golden fang.

“so… pretty generous there. am i gettin’ a preemptive tip here, or are you paying for two nights?” he questioned, cocking a bony brow and smirking lustfully. With a casual glance towards the double doors behind you (B's desk was out of sight beyond them, bringing further lift to his grin), he pulled a pack of cigarettes out of his jacket's interior, sliding it between his fangs and snapping his fingers before it to light it.

He took a deep drag, almost cathardic in his intake, then exhaled through his nasal cavity, his gaze returning to yours. He bent to meet your eye, smile lazy and tinged with the smoke of his smouldering cigarette. His sockets were hooded and seductive, the chain on his collar swinging idly in the space between you. 

“cuz i promise you… you won’t have the presence of mind for a second once i’m done with you.”

He stood back to his full height, taking another deep pull at his cigarette, then withdrew it and, with a cruel tilt to his smile, blew the smoke into your face, pulling you closer with a single claw, hooked in the neck of your shirt.

“but by all means… you're more than welcome to try me out.”

There's something... strange about the cigarette smoke, filling your head with a dark haze that tasted like magic; you didn't even cough, despite the thickness of it, and swayed on your feet, almost drunk on it in a moment. The pull of his hand was welcome, anticipated even... the bind of thick leather around your wrists desperately desired, and the pull of your pants down to your ankles met with bated breath.

You hadn't even noticed him teleporting you to another room, not until your face pressed into the rumpled surface of bedsheets, and you shuddered at the cadence of his laugh as it broke through the cloud of arousal thick smoke in your mind, both dark and lustful. The simultaneous heat of his almost terrifyingly long cock and the cool of the multiple piercings lining the length of its underside as he pressed it to your backside was, perhaps, the only thing that could have distracted you from it, in your fervor... besides the dig of his claws into your hips, lifting you higher as he thrust himself up the length of your lower back, his intention as clear as his low tenor in the dark of your clinging passion.

“don't worry. i’ll make it worth your extra patronage.”

 


	8. The Horror of it All

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You have a taste for the scary things in life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And you know just where to find it.

* * *

rbssns asked: You make horror Sans sound like a great time. *Drop 5000G* let's do this

* * *

 

B looked up at you sharply, paling just the slightest amount. She hesitated, casting a covert glance at the half closed double doors, then swallowed audibly, reaching down to pull one of the drawers of her desk open.

From within, she pulled a single sheet of paper, with the words "Liability Release Documentation" printed across the top in cool, clinical lettering.

"I hate to have you do this, my dear... are you sure that's who you want? There are so many others..."

You shook your head, set on your path, and signed the form willingly, and with a flourish. B sighed in response, shaking her head and picking up the paper with slightly tremulous hands. She pressed a blood red button on her key pad, then waved you through, carefully filing the document away.

"He'll be waiting, my love."

B's tentative demeanor did nothing to change your mind, and you strode confidently through the doors, across the lounge floor, and directly to the velvet rope that closed off the darkest section of the bar from the rest, the monsters within only pausing in their conversations long enough to cast you ironic, caustic, and cruel looks before turning back to their occupations. The only one who's gaze lingered... was Horror.

And he looked at you with a hunger that sent a river of ice through your veins.

He lifted himself from his place beside his brother, his grin unmoving but the blown out, overlarge scarlet iris within his single lit socket pulsing eagerly. He slammed his axe into the table beside his chaise, and everyone in the room but Crooks flinched.

“smart choice, sugarplum. you know what you really want out of life… you wanna taste of somethin’ truly special, no matter the cost.”

He stalked towards you, tossing the rope out of his way distractedly, and circled you like an animal, a rabid, slavering beast intent on his hunt. Once behind you, he stopped, and leaned into you, inhaling against your neck, long and devoutly.

“an’ me? i want a taste of _you_.”

He chuckled at your gasp, at your instinctual shudder, and parted his jaw to slick his long, slimy tongue along your shoulder and neck, sampling the bouquet of your flavor, the taste of arousal and the tinge of fear.

“heh… perfect little peach. you scared? you should be.”

The way you shivered in dread and anticipation before him only got him harder. He lost what was left of his composure in seconds, dragged you back against him, and bucked his erection against your ass, groping every inch of soft flesh he could reach. Your clothes were already tearing, under his fervent claws, and a growl of pure, unrestrained lust rumbled against your back.

“stars, you an’ me are gonna have some _fun_.”

* * *

 

 


	9. Ace in the Hole

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mob likes to play things close to the chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mobtale Sans

* * *

Anonymous asked: *slowly pops up* ... Question... Would Mob Sans be available too? *quickly pops down*

* * *

 

B winked at you from over the edge of the desk where you were crouched, and pulled a wrapped cigar from one of her drawers, sliding it and a pack of matches across the surface of the desk towards the tip of your nose.

"Why don't you go see for yourself, dear heart. I'm sure you know where to look~"

She turned back to her work, which seemed to be looking at a selection of multicolored, monstrous dildos on her computer screen, and left you to ponder the meaning of her comment with an inscrutible smile and a press of a button. With a shrug, you stood to your full height and scooped up the offerings before letting yourself into the lounge, and readied yourself to wander a bit, not entirely sure where to look for the suave monster.

You should have known you'd find him beside the poker table, watching you over the edge of his cards and dragging the tip of one phalange around the lip of a half drunk tumbler of golden liquid, what could only be alcohol. He beckoned you closer with a jerk of his chin and a pat of his knee, his smile wide and crooked, and wrapped his arm around your waist when you took his offered seat on his femur, pressing a lingering kiss to the curve of your jaw as you sat.

His suit coat was draped across the back of the stool he sat on, his tie loose and his hat crooked on his skull, but from the cards in his hand (and the few you could feel inside his shirt sleeve), he was less than ruffled by his game, and readily took his gaze off the tabletop and his opponents in favor of the cigar you had in your hands, his sockets blazing brighter for a moment.

“how could you think i wouldn't be here, dove? i wouldn't miss out, when there’s love to be had and money to be made. banana’s being very generous to us on tha commission… plus, i wouldn’t skip out on gettin‘ the dust fucked outta me by a few gorgeous anons. now... why don't you put those pretty hands to use, mmm?”

He leans into you, whiskey and lecherous desire on his breath, a teasing inch from your lips, and waggles his bony brows until you, with a blush and a giggle, slid the cigar between his teeth for him and lit it; he sighed in relief, dragging deeply from it and exhaling a gout of pale smoke from his nasal cavity, before turning his sockets, lids now low and amourous, back to you.

"'m ever so grateful, pidg, just what the doctor ordered. let me pay ya back..."

He turned your chin with the hand that held his cigar between his fingers, smoke drifting about your face and the fall of your hair, and swallowed your gasp with a smooth laugh and a deep, consuming kiss. The smoke filled your senses, the drug of the alcohol on his tongue and the sheer overpowering feel of his against you, even as you felt him shift you against him with his now free hand (had he finished his game while kissing you? Multitalented...), his fingertips pulling at the buttons on your top fluidly.

When he pulled from your lips, it was only an inch, his breath, getting you drunk from just the closeness of him, washing hot and wanting over your parted, wetted lips. His free hand was buried under your shirt now, fondling your chest and glorying in the feel of you and gently urging you into climbing into his lap fully.

He rumbled out a laugh at your breathless whimper when he thrust against you once you had straddled his pelvis, tipping his hat off his skull and onto your head and brushing a thumb against a pebbled nipple. His smile grew with your groan.

“that’s it, doll… don’t be shy with me. let it all out. moan, say my name, _scream_ … we’ll have that precious throat raw by the time we’re done, i can promise ya that.”

Poker chips don't feel particularly good on the back, but you really couldn't say that that was what you were focused on while you were lying on them.

* * *

 

 


	10. Sweet as Honey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stretch satisfies your appetite.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Underswap Papyrus

* * *

Anonymous asked: *Pushes 5000 g across the desk without looking, eyes only for Stretch.* "So I was thinking. I taste every damn inch of you, you taste every damn inch of me, and we fuck until we can't make words. Sound good?"

* * *

 

Casanova makes a quiet sound of disapproval at your brazenness, his tail swishing about behind him from his seat on the edge of B's desk, but the mistress of the lounge shooshed him with a croon and a fingertip run down his spine, merely reaching out to take your money and deposit it for you.

There were more important things than talking, after all... and judging from the way you were currently all but preying on the monster eyeing you from just inside the doors of the lounge, she had an idea what your most important thing was.

Stretch, for his part, crunched through the rest of the sucker held between his teeth as you approached singlemindedly, chewing contemplatively as he looked you up and down. His grin was was as obvious your desire, and he beckoned you closer with a sultry wink and a slow nod of his head, leaning against the wall beside him and twirling his now empty sucker stick between his teeth idly.

“sounds like the best offer i’ve gotten in my life, sugar,” he purred, and reached out to caress the narrow of your waist when you approached him, free hand already undoing the button on his pants. He pulled you closer to his torso, though, wagging a bony brow and spitting his lollipop stick into a nearby trashcan absently. It hit the edge and bounced into the bag with a satisfying ding, acknowledged by the further curving of his grin (though it could have also been accentuated by your own arms rising to circle his broad shoulders).

He bent to press a slow, sticky kiss to your lips, smoky and sweet and as intoxicating as the press of his hand to the swell of your hip, before pulling back just enough to nip at your lower lip and meet your eye again, his smirk lazy and more than a little suggestive.

“so how about this? you sit your fine ass on my face, let me get a taste test in… and you use these sexy lips to suck me off. see how we feel after that.”

He slipped the tip of his glowing orange tongue between his teeth teasingly, tracing it over your lower lip slowly, sockets hooded and lustful, and slid his hand lower, easily grasping a handful of ass and grinding you against the femur he had slipped between your thighs.

“so do me a flavor, honey… and strip for me.”

69 had always been one of your favorite numbers, and with his face buried between your legs, he only renewed your love for it. 

* * *

 

 


	11. The Belly of the Beast

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's been some questions going around about where the wild things are.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beasttale Sans, and a few others~

* * *

Anonymous asked: *clutches gold apprehensively* You wouldn't happen to have beasttale sans hanging out in the ol' skelly brothel would you? I don't get to see much of bomberboy from pretty much anyone these days. :(

Anonymous asked: A-Are all of the beast skellies in the brothel or is it just Bomberboy?

Anonymous asked: How much for a ride on a gaster blaster sans?

* * *

B touched the side of her nose knowingly, taking the pile of bills from between your hands carefully and with an understanding smile, then waved a hand towards the double doors across the lobby from the full waiting room, indicating a very large offshoot of the lounge floor, with a particularly high ceiling and almost comically large furniture.

Within, you could see huge, often horned and clawed monsters lying across the overstuffed, scratched up chaises and chairs, chatting amongst each other or napping in piles of bones and pillows. Here and there amongst them prowled Gaster Beasts, pawing at powerful, sweeping tails or play fighting with one another; a pair of lamias hissed at each other over what appeared to be their dinner, baring curved, venomous fangs. A huge demonic skeleton flexed his bony wings from a high perch, toying with a ball of fire, while what appeared to be a skeletal drider strutted about a silk strewn alcove, hanging what looked like a cocoon on one of the walls.

“We have a good sized collection of the more… bestial monsters here, my lovelies, and took special care to make room for them~ They’re the same price as everyone else, of course, 5000 g to the head (or dick, hehehe), but some of them are very rambunctious, I’m sure you’re aware… and as most are very close to their wild natures, most are inclined towards breeding. So just keep that in mind, as well as their size, before requesting them.”

Her eyes twinkled slyly, as she slotted your pay into the box, her lower lip caught between her teeth.

“And while I did have help in having this universe deactivated from the usual magicks of the heat cycle, I  _ did _ manage to get my hands on a certain… substance, that can bring it on in a specific subject. As you’re likely well aware, heats in a normal monster can be dangerous; they can be especially so in a monster the size and ferocity of a Beasttale boy, a Mythmonster, a Gasterbeast, or any of the other wild ones. So, you understand, of course, the need for me to have you sign a liability release form should you choose to indulge in an artificial heat with one of the big boys~”

You nodded your understanding, only more excited from her explanation (and her own clear excitement), and only kept from sprinting across the lounge by the skin of your teeth, your fingers knitted together behind your back and your gaze intense, where it was locked on the monster you had come to see.

Beast’s own had found you the moment you came into view, over the end of the sofa he was reclined on, and as you approached, his grin became all but bloodthirsty, creasing his broad face into expectant eagerness.

His skeletal tail swished over the shag carpet one of his feet hung onto, claws dug into the fibers comfortably, and his long, slithering, chartreuse tongue swept over his jagged fangs, tasting both the air and the lunch he had just seemed to have finished up, a large platter set on a low footrest nearby. He turned onto his side, as you drew even with him, stretching luxuriously, and beckoned you closer with a single, curved claw.

“it’s like the crazy one said, kitten… we’re  _ all _ here, as many as your imagination can hold. i don’t know how b’s managed it, keeping us all here without a fight breaking out… maybe cuz we’re here for love and lust, and not anger and vengeance, for once. that, or it’s the contract she had us all sign. might’ve had more magic in it than we thought.”

He shrugged his massive shoulders, clearly unconcerned, before reaching out to cup your hip in a large palm, pulling you closer. He leaned his nasal ridge into your throat, scenting your arousal and readiness for him, instantly slavering for a taste of your flesh. He shifted where he lay, his pants incapable of restraining his intimidating cock, and slid the waistband down to release himself.

The length of him sprang free with eager vengeance, and twitched desirously in the warm, smoky air and under your fevered gaze, his free hand stroking himself, from tip to knot, teasing a dribble of glistening seed from himself that held your eye almost magnetically.

“but if you’re looking for me, you must have a hunger for the wilder side of things. c’mere… get a taste, pet. let’s see how desperately you’ve missed me… and how much you can take.”

He took your hand in his, so much smaller than his padded bones, his thick phalanges and razor sharp claws, to replace his own around the thickness of his cock; your fingers didn’t even close all the way around him, despite your all too willing attempts to try, but the last thing you were was a quitter.

You had two hands, didn’t you? Might as well use them.

* * *

 


	12. Three's a Crowd

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Comic and Lust don't always work well together... unless it comes to you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Undertale Sans (Comic) and Underlust Sans (Lust).

* * *

Anonymous asked: I’ve got 10,000g! Does that get me a threesome? *waves hi to UT and UL Sans*

* * *

B turned to look at you from under her elbow, standing atop a ladder behind her desk. She seemed to be working on hanging a new sign above her office door, and though she looked rather precarious in her pencil skirt and heels on the top rung, Red, holding the ladder for her securely, made no move to stop her, sending you a wink and a very obvious look upwards, his smirk broad and pleased.

“Of course it does sweetheart! You- oof! Sans, please hold it still, I know you think it’s funny but it’s really not- just leave your gold on the desk, I’ll sort everything out later, and head on in! Comic and Lust will be waiting for you, they’re very excited!” she called out, one hand on the dome of Red’s skull and the other reaching far above her head to straighten her sign (Red shot you a covert grin, running one hand up her thigh to, you were sure, “steady” her), and you shrugged, plopped your bag of gold down on the desk beside Casanova’s napping pillow as instructed, and let yourself into the lounge.

It didn’t take much looking to find Lust. He was hard to miss, despite his sultry, velvetine voice and smooth laughter, the way he melted into those around him without even trying; his clothes stood out a mile, drawing to the eye and twice as soft as they looked, saying nothing of his insane habit of moving to any music that happened to be playing in his vicinity.

You found him bumping and grinding not far from his own catwalk, in the company of his brother and the Dancetale crew; his dance was so hypnotic, so drawing and enticing, that you almost didn’t notice him watching you right back, your eyes glued to the gyration of his hips, until he lowered a hand and beckoned your gaze higher. He laughed along with your nervous titter, his grin desirous and more than forgiving, and ran his hands down his own body before waving you closer, sockets narrowed seductively.

A lithe, supple tongue of violet magic swept across his teeth hungrily, his gaze raking your body in anticipation as you approached with haltering steps, his touch fleeting as he circled you, dragged his fingertips along your lower back, your hips, up your arms and throat teasingly.

“money well spent, gorgeous... you won’t be disappointed, i can promise you that. yo, comic. they wanted you too, get off your ass and get to work.”

Lust’s hands finally halted at your waist, slipping under the fabric of your shirt to rub at the arch of your hipbones, the narrow of your climbing waist, enticing and compelling and sending shivers through your whole body, just as another pair of hands, more commanding and insistent, circled your waist from behind.

Hot breath wafted over the back of your neck, accompanied by a chuckle and a flash of cobalt blue magic, caught from the corner of your eye.

“well spent indeed… but i have to wonder. do you really know what you’ve just bought yourself, kid? we’re not exactly the type that’ll hurt ya, don’t get me wrong… but that doesn’t make us any less bone-fide, heh. we’ll still dick you down a skele-ton.”

Lust snorted, rolling the lilac hearts in his sockets, but couldn’t hide his broad grin or the rumble of pleasure in his hollow chest as he slid his hands up the front of your top. The material of his gloves was soft, soft as his voice as he pressed himself to your front at the same moment Comic pushed himself to your posterior; the depth of their desire was evident immediately, rock hard and twitching and filling your already enamoured head with a cloud of rapture.

“bit late for a warning now, though, isn’t it? they’ve bought their bed… time to get fucked in it.”

Comic snorted out a laugh, hands circling your waist to undo your pants at the same moment as his jaw parted, the tip of a hot, wet tongue climbing the column of your throat sending a wave of gooseflesh down your back.

“suppose so. just remember the safe word, babe… and don’t blame us if you can’t walk in the morning.”

You didn’t blame anyone, certainly not them.

* * *

 


	13. A Sticky Interlude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> These will happen occasionally <3 you'll have to forgive me, I cut most of them, but a few I liked too much to leave out entirely. I'll post something longer and more interesting later~

* * *

Kaleia asked: Ohhh dear lord Banana! So many hot skeletons everywhere!.... God I can feel there eye sockets on me like predators who wants there prey so badly. The sin is everywhere!

* * *

Banana snickered from her seat, popping open a can of cashews for her bitty. Casanova stood as patiently as he was able while she poured him a cupful, though his tail whipped back and forth and he let out several tiny whines while she did so, and immediately pounced on the cup she offered him as soon as she held it out to him.

“It’s a hot mess in here, that’s for sure. I’ve had to do some mopping up myself, when the maids get overworked. Did you know magic congeals if it’s left on any material besides laminate? Terrible stuff to clean, it’s so stubborn… I’m just lucky that it doesn’t ever smell. Heaven help me if it ever clogs the plumbing.”

She seemed to shudder at the thought, reaching out to pet Cassy’s skull, and popped a cashew in her own mouth in thought, sending you a covert smile.

“Shame it’s so fun to work and play with, am I right?”

* * *

 


	14. A Tortoise's Humble Request

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A special request for a very special friend~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Underfell Sans.

* * *

tyranttortoise asked: Can I drop some G for some good ol' Red? I'm in dire need of a potassium suppliment, and you know I'm more than willing for a love bite or five. ;) I'll give as good as I get.

* * *

 

B beamed brightly up at you from her paperwork, standing to hug you across the desk, and immediately waved you inside, sharing your wink knowingly.

“You know where to find him, Ty. He’s been waiting~”

And indeed it seemed he had, and looked like he had even cleaned himself up a bit, too; he was wearing one of his better, cleaner hoodies, the lesser stained of his shorts, and had even tied his shoes for the occasion, though you weren’t all too sure why he’d bothered.

He wouldn’t be wearing any of it much longer. 

Red chuckled, where he stood against the edge of the bar, hands in his jacket pockets and grin sloppy and satisfied. The smoke of his extinguished cigar still wafted from between his fangs, pale in its final breaths, but carried with it the fumes of the bottom of his whiskey glass as well, swirling on his warm, fond laughter as you drew near, like the embrace of an old, old friend.

“knew i’d see ya sooner rather ‘n later, softshell… i know how thirsty ya are for me. it’d almost be shameful if it weren’t sexy as all hell… andja know if it weren’t the rules, i’d do ya for free.”

He pulled you against him the moment you were within reach, slipping his hands down the back of your pants to grope your ass unabashedly, using his firm grasp to grind his already manifested cock against your lower stomach. His grin was lecherous, dripping with scarlet saliva and glinting with gold, and descended to press to your lips needily when you gasped at his audacity.

You didn’t really know why you were surprised with him anymore, honestly. He got what he wanted, when he wanted it, and apologized to no one.

His tongue prised your lips apart the moment he kissed you, and lifted you to straddle his hips, grunting at the feeling of your heat through both of your pants and bucking against you impatiently. You wrapped your legs around his pelvis, your arms around his neck, and he practically purred, pulling back to look seductively into your eyes.

A string of your mixed saliva stretched between your lips and his, glistening almost as brightly as his charged gaze.

“sweet as ever… guess i’m just as thirsty as you, eh?”

He snickered at your blush, and squeezed your ass at the same moment that he ducked his head to lick up the length of your throat, his fangs scraping tantalizingly along your flesh. He growled at the shiver that ran through your body, his grin stretching only wider.

“don’tcha worry, ty… red’s gonna take  _ real _ good care a ya.”

* * *

 


	15. B Mine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> B addresses the requests that have been made for her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> B herself, and Sansy Fresh.

* * *

Anonymous asked: 5000g for the skeletons but how much for some time with the sweet treat in charge ;)

popbm asked: How much for you bananna?

* * *

B blinked, then blushed brightly, waving a hand through the air dismissively, as though to clear the air entirely of the idea.

“Oh, you guys. I’ve got nothing on the boys, they’re the main event. Me, I’m just here to feed all of your desires for skeletons and such things,” she giggled, looking down at the papers on the desk in front of her in feigned interest, as though desperate for something to turn her attention to  besides the conversation at hand, but beside her at the desk, seated in his own spinning office chair and chin propped on his folded hands, a brightly dressed skeleton wearing multi colored sunglasses, a gold chain necklace, and a propeller snap-back was grinning pointedly at the mistress of the lounge, unmoving and obviously intent on the conversation.

“yo, sounds like they want a bite of the banana herself, boss lady,” he observed, the chain of paper clips he was stringing together clacking against the desk leg. “why not cut loose, enjoy yourself… make some cheddar of your own while you’re at it~”

Banana scowled at the monster beside her, very red in the face, and pointedly picked up a decorating magazine to hide her face behind, the pages crinkling under her painted nails despite her best effort.

“Fresh,  _ really _ . It was never supposed to be about me, I just want-” she started to protest, but Fresh, his sunglasses flashing the word ‘STOP’ across them, tsked his tongue and sat forward to push her magazine out of the way.

“b, babe. chill. you wanna make people happy, right? ain’t that what they’re diggin’ on?” he asked pointedly, indicating the both of you standing across the desk from them watching the conversation with interest, and B, quieting and sobering in a moment of introspection, bit her lower lip as she thought before looking up at you both, smiling slowly and shyly.

“Well, I mean. If that’s what you really want… same price for me, I suppose?”

* * *

 

 


	16. The Dark Side

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You find yourself in the grasp of some truly bad monsters... but you put yourself there, and you couldn't ask for more.
> 
> *Warning: violent content, blood, and mention of death ahead*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Horrortale Sans, Dusttale Sans, and Axetale Sans.

* * *

Anonymous asked: *slams down 15000g* Dust. Axe. Horror.... Pls.

* * *

Three pairs of sockets locked on you from the dark, intimidating corner across the room the moment you spoke your desire, searching and intent. You felt their gazes like knives even a hundred feet away, carving through your clothes and flesh, down to the bone with the ease of razors, but you felt no fear… you shivered at the delectable excitement that ran through your entire form, flooding your blood with endorphins, arousal fogging your mind and blanking it of anything but the heat and weight of their gazes.

This may very well be the last thing you ever did in the world… but what a way to go out.

B let out a quiet sigh at your request, looking you and your visible excitement over, before pulling out a liability form and sliding it across the desk for you to sign. It was clear you knew what you were doing, there was little point in attempting to talk you out of it, and she didn’t attempt to.

She knew the draw the darker ones had well enough for herself. She wasn’t one to judge.

You signed the paper without reading it, true to form, but your mind wasn’t on the task in the first place; you could hardly pay under the distraction of  _ them _ , the whispers you were sure you could hear in the back of your mind, beckoning you closer, into their arms, and at last B let you free, waving you off to your fun with one last sad, but understanding look.

As you approached, at long last, the sinister beings watching you, they shifted and emerged from the dark beyond the velvet rope, shadows and demons and the beasts that haunted the edges of nightmares: Horror stalked around you, inspecting you for his tastes and growling under his breath; Axe, carefully removing the golden locket around his neck and placing it in his pocket, seared your form with his two-toned gaze, a hunger for more than flesh apparent on his destroyed face.

Dust only stood before you, arms folded and skull tilted and smile odd, just a little too crooked and wrong.

“a glutton… how ironic, that you should find your pleasure with three of the most gluttonous monsters in the multiverse. and more than just a little taste for death and pain in you… strange, for a human.”

In one step, he stood nose to nasal cavity with you, mad, swirling gaze of blue and red hypnotizing you. The whispers in the back of your head held their breaths, hanging on his every word, just the same as you.

“but you paid for us, knowing what we are. strange though you be… you’ll get what you came for. pray you survive it, to any god you dare defile the name of. i doubt they’ll listen.”

Dust curled his hand into the front of your shirt, pulling you towards him, lowering his hood, and leaning in to trace a tongue the tasted of blood and dust across your parted lips; you breathed into his touch, lost and craven, and snaked your tongue out to touch his in return, breathless with need, but got no further. 

Horror snapped his jaws, slavering with want and snarling in jealousy, and latched onto one of your arms, pulling you back towards himself violently; your shirt ripped in Dust’s grasp, baring your chest and sending a gasp from your lips.

“ _ i _ want them first,” the larger monster growled ferally, clutching you against himself and rutting against your hip in bestial lust, and Dust sighed dramatically, rolling his gaze in his sockets and already stalking towards you both to reclaim his treasure.

Axe held his arm between the both of them, however, a trail of black saliva, wended through with blue magic, dripping from his jaws; his gaze was locked with your slightly panicked eyes, his smile unhinged and ruthless.

“they requested us  _ all _ . there’s no sense in fighting over turns… they clearly wanted the full package. surely we can spare our differences for a few hours.”

The others stared at him, quiet and cold… before Dust cackled, looking down at you with sinister acknowledgment. He ripped the rest of your shirt from your body in shreds, and traced his clawed phalanges up your chest harshly, on the bridge of pleasure and pain.

“they did at that. why not? they’ve got plenty of holes for their choice of prime meat, eh heh…”

Horror chuckled menacingly at your back, and cupped between your thighs obscenely with a large, clawed hand, slobbering over your neck and grinding his erection against your ass.

“and a lot of extra space to make a few more.”

Axe wasted no time on words, his own hands joining the fray in seizing one of yours and squeezing it around his length through his shorts, his neck craning to capture your lips and nearly choke you with his thrusting tongue.

He only pulled back when you began to struggle for air, and bit your lower lip in passing, licking at the blood that escaped the torn flesh. He was rutting against your palm eagerly, and from the sharpness of the gazes of the other two monsters… they weren’t too far behind his eagerness.

“glad we’re all agreed… now get them on the floor. i haven’t gotten laid in almost twenty years… i wanna make ‘em  _ scream _ .”

“agreed.”

“oh sweetmeat… you’re in for the time of your life.”

“or what’s left of it, heh.”

* * *

 


	17. Monster Cum, Its Properties, and You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A fair question, and an honest answer <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *B herself, Casanova, and a mystery of the universe.*

Missfangirl-slightly-obsessive asked: Magic congeals? Is it.. Sorry to for crude language.. Cum? Were talking about the magical cum...right? It taste good? How did you know? *insert lenny face* and how do they taste? Im sooooooooo curious now °^° is there different taste depending on who? I must research this for science!  


* * *

B looked shrewd for a moment, tracing a finger along Casanova’s spine, where he lay curled in a ball on his napping pillow, and hid a secret smile behind the fall of her scarlet curls. She waved a hand at you dismissively, dismissing your qualms easily, and, oddly, pulled a pamphlet out from a clear plastic display on one of the corners of her desk, pressing it into your hands meaningfully.

...Monster Cum, It’s Properties, and You?

“It’s not crude, my darling. They’re made of magic, of course their cum is too! It’s got a wonderful tingling sensation, they can make it thick or thin as they please… they can even vibrate it inside you, if that’s your thing, heh. It tastes mostly like… how to describe it… like you’d imagine space would. Kinda, sparkly? A little sweet… light and airy… it’s very difficult to describe, honestly. The taste does change a bit between monsters, depending on what sort of food they’ve eaten, where they’re from, what color their magic is, the like. And as for how I know…”

She had the decency to blush, avoiding your gaze and looking down at her knees for a moment. When she looked back at you, it was with the slightest bit of mischief, a twinkle in her eye and in the curve of her painted lips.

“Well, let’s just say part of the recruitment was on a one-on-one basis, and… occasionally… I may spend some of my own gold here.”

For some reason, you had a feeling “some” might be an understatement.

* * *

 


	18. A Sticky Situation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stretch and Mutt help you scratch your itch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Underswap Papyrus and Swapfell Papyrus*

Anonymous asked: *looks around curiously* With all these handsome skellies around, Russ and Stretch wouldn't happen to free would they? I have an itch that needs scratching.

* * *

As coincidence would have it, Stretch was lingering beside the coffee stand just at the moment that you inquired after him, stirring a coffee mug with a plastic spoon. His grin widened at the sound of his name, his gaze moving over to look you over as you bandied with B, and he leaned one shoulder against the wall beside him a he watched and waited for you to notice him, sipping at his mug and tapping the toe of one bright orange Converse against the carpet.

It didn’t take you long, the clink of you coin falling into the box and your eager turn towards the ajar double doors, to spot him, and you jumped to find him so readily near, flushing prettily in a moment of self-conscious awareness. He only tutted at that, though, and tossed back the rest of his drink before setting it aside, kicking away from the wall, and strolling over to you, one hand in his hoodies’ pocket and the other reaching out to trace the line of your jaw.

“c’mon, honey, don’t be like that. we all get that itch now and again… and i can promise that me an’ rus both have time for you,” he assured you, bending to press a kiss, sweet with the fumes of… had he been drinking Mountain Dew out of that cup?, to the corner of your lips teasingly, then took your idly limp hand in his, tugging at it indicatively and jerking his head towards the doors.

“so let’s find the lazabout and get to scratchin’.”

Mutt wasn’t difficult to find, even among the crowds of monsters standing and lazing about the lounge floor; his lanky legs, leather jacket, and spiked collar were ostentatious amongst the crowd, saying nothing of the cloud of smoke he was surrounded by (was it… orange?), and his gaze, as sharp as his jagged fangs, found yours as soon as you began to approach, his smile twisted and wry. 

He stubbed out what looked like half a smoking dog biscuit in a nearby ash tray as you and Stretch drew even with him, scooting over on his lounge to allow more room (which Stretch immediately took, plopping down with a sigh and a comfortable oof), then patted his lap imperiously, blowing out a last, languid stream of smoke from his nasal cavity as he did.

You answered his unspoken command immediately, crawling onto the expanse of his spread femurs and swallowing against your tight throat in anticipation; bony hands settled on your hips to move you into place from behind, a huff of laughter and sugar sweet breath tickling the back of your neck (‘there we are, nice and comfy~”), and Mutt, one hand taking your chin in his half gloved hand to turn it from side to side, smirked down at you.

“pretty little thing… heard you had some needs that only we could fulfill. heh... i’m not surprised. you look the kind of whore that couldn’t be satisfied with the mundane.” 

He chuckled darkly at the flush that climbed your throat to tint your cheeks again, moving his hand along the side of your face and into your hair; he tightened his grip there, pulling gently but firmly forward to show you was in charge, then leaned forward, pressing his mouth against your ear and grasping at your hip with his other hand.

“so greedy… one dick not good enough for you? had to go for the twofer special? what a precocious  _ slut _ ,” he growled against your jaw, his fangs scraping against your earlobe and sending a shiver through your whole body and a whimper tumbling from your lips, of humiliation, lust, or both, you couldn’t say, and between your thighs, you felt his erection throb, his claws digging into your hip and pressing you down into him needily.

Stretch, behind the both of you, let out a tsk, slowly rolling his hips against your backside even as his own hands climbed your torso, shifting your shirt up under his palms. His erection was just as blatant as Mutt’s, hot and hard against your lower back, and you can’t help but whine at the sensation, at the quick bite Mutt delivered to your shoulder as he licked his way down your throat and ground you down against his cock.

“aw, don’t be mean to them, rus… they can’t help base attraction, the thirst for two tall drinks of water. and they’ll get their money’s worth, too.”

Mutt smirked at that, and leaned back from your shoulder, shaking his hand free from your hair and tracing its claws along the shape of your lips, reveling in the trembling of your body, the shaky exhalation of your breath against his bones. 

“that’n more. but i’ve got the cure for that kind of thirst.”

He lowered his hand to his belt buckle, undoing it with skill and speed that belied much practice, and, holding your gaze meaningfully, unzipped his pants enough to release his intimidating length. 

It slapped, dappled with precum and twitching eagerly, against your bare abdomen (the piercings along its underside were cool against your skin, a contrast to your overwhelming heat), your shirt pulled over your head almost without your noticing, but you barely had time to look at it before your felt your hair wound around another skeletal hand, and your face was turned away, twisted to meet the dripping head of Stretch’s cock.

You could barely glimpse the edge of his grin, from the corner of your eye, its curve betraying his humor.

“i think that’s my line.”

* * *

 


	19. Tea Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Do you like yours hot or cold? If you don't know already, you'll find out soon~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Undertale Sans, and G!Papyrus*

Anonymous asked:  *hands over 10,000g* so......i was wondering if i could have some time with Blue and g!Pap? Bet that's a unique pairing you haven't seen before. I'm just giggling thinking about it really, haha. But good giggling.

* * *

B, indeed, looked very surprised at the idea, blinking up at you from her seat and lowering her brows, but almost immediately afterwards shrugged her shoulders and smiled brightly, turning back to her computer and pressing two buttons, cobalt blue and mottled lilac.

“It’s not for me to judge, my darling~ most of the monsters here work rather well together, barring a few… questionable pairings. No one’s ever asked for those though... thank the stars for that,” she breathed with relief, smiling up at you as you slotted your payment into the box, and waved you in afterwards with a coy wink.

“Have fun, love. I think you’ll find them near the tea room; G!Pap does love his Darjeeling.”

You’d have liked to know how to find the tea room, once you made your way into the lounge and looked over the many offshooting hallways and rooms; it definitely seemed, even given the size of the building from the outside, that the inside was significantly larger. Magic? Probably. It likely wasn’t outside the prowess of the gathered minds present.

After wandering about the floor for awhile, and finally asking for directions from the very helpful Grillby behind the bar (“...I can’t blame you for getting lost in here. Excepting the tour I got, I would have wandered into the pool room more than once.”), you did at last manage to find the tea room, a small but homey enclosure teeming with hanging, flowering plants, low, cloth covered tea tables, the scent of cakes and spices, and cases and cases, set against the window studded walls, of tea sets, antique and modern alike. 

Several skeletons were dotted about the room, most sequestered to their own tables, reading books and doing puzzles and sipping at their steaming teacups, but at one in particular, set in a corner beside a large reading window, sat Comic and G!Pap, chatting over what looked like a game of Scrabble.

You approached them with your fingers twisted together behind your back, lower lip held between your teeth, and as you drew near, the monsters finally noticed your approach, Comic’s addition of the letter ‘F’ to the word ‘ART’ already on the board interrupted by your appearance.

He smiled broadly, and a little teasingly, as he gained his feet to greet you, and wound one arm around your waist to push a kiss to your neck, lingering and worshipful (“nice of ya to  _ letter _ yourself in, kid… was gettin’  _ board _ without ya, heh…”), while, from his own chair, the tall, stately Papyrus you had also requested rose from his seat to press himself to your back, bending to nuzzle at your hair.

He guided your body back into the fold of his embrace, large and comforting and warm, while Comic, sockets narrowed and smile soft and playful, circled you to run his hands along the dip of your waist, the tip of his tongue traveling along the curve of your clavicle in a sinuous dance that sent a tremble of desire through your form.

“Unique indeed. I am not often requested, though it is pleasant to be noticed. Comic and I are very different in sexual temperament, as I’m sure you know… but it is your choice,” he murmured as he rubbed his nasal ridge against the shell of your ear, breathing in your bouquet rapturously, and Comic hummed in agreement, hands already slipping under the front of your top to drag it up over your chest, phalanges zeroing in on your nipples. 

Your moans and shudders were ecstasy on your breath, a drug he lapped from your flesh even as he pressed himself against you, just as desperate to feel you as you were to feel him.

“pap is right there, kid… you’re playin’ with hot and cold today. but if you’re into that… who am i to deny you?”

He drew back to smirk at you wickedly, a knowing laugh on his breath, his desire a hot, hard presence pressed against your thigh... his hands eliciting shuddering moans from your lips as he twisted at your nipples gently.

“you wanna be sandwiched between a sub and a dom, i ain’t gonna stop you.”

Papyrus turned your chin to meet your lips in a soft, adoring kiss, the crack below his left socket scraping your flesh unnoticed as his free hand plucked at the button on your pants almost supplicantly, a silent question that you answered with a desperate nod, one of your hands clutching at the collar of his long coat… the other dug into the back of Comic’s skull, lowered as he bent to enclose one of your nipples in his mouth.

You felt both of their smiles widen, pressed against your flesh, and heard Papyrus’ whisper against your lips, as the spark of magic and the heat of lust overcame your senses.

“Your will be done, lover.”

* * *

 


	20. Four of a Kind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You know just what you want... and who you want it from.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Undertale Sans, Underfell Sans, Underswap Sans, Underlust Sans*

Anonymous asked: *pays 50,000g to Banana * I want two combos, please!! May I have UF and UL Sanses first and UT and US Sanses later?? *Lusty anon

* * *

You seemed to have found B in the middle of hanging yet another sign beside her desk, though this one didn’t require the use of such a tall ladder; she wasn’t paying you any mind, mounting a large neon message board that read ‘Cumming Next’ from the top of a stepstool, and only noticed you when she wobbled down on her heels to plug it in, spying you from the corner of her eye as she stood back up to admire it. 

She waved you over, panting slightly and dusting her too tight top off, and smiling happily as a customer name popped up on the message board, under a banner that announced  ‘Now Serving’. It was your name.

“Sorry, my darling… woof, that thing was heavy. Hah. Okay, sorry to keep you waiting~ I see you’re next… let’s take a look at what we’ve got coming up.”

Waving a hand near her face to cool the sweat there, the matron of the lounge rounded her desk (there was a dusty, skeletal handprint on her rear, standing out against her black pencil skirt), sat herself in her office chair with a sigh and more bounce than she probably intended, and tossed a few locks of her curly hair from her eyes before plucking your request from the top of her towering inbox. She hummed beneath her breath as she read it, raising her brows behind the thick rims of her glasses, then sent you a knowing smile as she tapped at her message board, selecting four different keys with a flourish. 

“Quite the appetite on you, my love… I like it. They’ll be waiting for you when you get in… just remember to take breaks~ Red gets pretty into it, especially in a competitive environment, and Blueberry can be very energetic.”

You nodded enthusiastically, flushed and eager to begin, and rushed through the double doors the moment that B waved you through; you didn’t have far to search, to your (and your over excited libido’s) relief, finding three of your selected foursome of skeletal lovers gossiping together on a pair of chaise lounges only a few feet from the lounge entrance. Only Red was missing, and though you pouted at his lateness… you knew you could count on him to be there, and didn’t bother to hide your giddy smile as the other monsters spotted you, their conversation dwindling as their own smiles grew.

Lust stood to welcome you with open arms, sockets hooded and radiating sex and desire, and was quick, the moment you stepped close enough, to pull you flush with his body with both hands clasped on your ass, swallowing your gasp with a needy, explorative kiss. The fur on his hooded vest tickled your flesh, his tongue parting your lips skillfully, and his already manifested cock pressed to your lower abdomen, half bared over the waistband of his low riding, tight pants, hot and drawing your attention without quarter.

He purred against your lips, lavender tongue traipsing in and out of your mouth indicatively, trading breath and sweet, intoxicating saliva (magic, you supposed… his was almost like a drug).

“mmm… delicious, lover, absolutely  _ delicious _ . i can’t wait to taste the rest of you…”

You were pulled from his arms the moment that he began to toy with the edge of your shirt, though, pressed, back to front, with a broad, far larger ribcage. Clawed phalanges dug under your chin and forced your gaze up, to meet the scarlet, flared magic of your late partner, Red. He smirked at your flushed visage, the trail of purple saliva leaking from your lips, and ran his free hand down your front to your abdomen, pressing your body back against his pelvis, against his already bared, studded cock.

He pulled, gently but insistently, on your chin until you stood on tiptoe, his other hand scooting your legs apart, and, with a grunt of satisfaction, thrust his length between your thighs; he immediately began bucking his pelvis against your backside, rubbing the massive girth of himself along the seam of your thighs, and encouraged you to squeeze your legs together around him, the tip of his tongue peeking between his fangs rapturously. He bent to tick the ridge of his nasal cavity against your nose, teasing the crease of your lips with his dripping tongue.

“not til i get a taste myself… now open up for daddy, sweetheart.”

He captured your lips the moment you obeyed, stealing your breath and splitting your attention between his tongue invading your mouth and the thick length of him thrusting between your legs, so close and yet so far, and Lust pulling your shirt up over your chest, immediately lavishing his tongue over your nipples and running his half gloved palms over your abdomen.

Your eyes were already rolling, hands grasping for purchase on your skeletal lovers’ shoulders and vertebrae, while in the background, still reclining on their lounge, Blueberry bounced excitedly in place, impatient and energetic. Comic sat on the cushion beside him, watching you enjoy yourself and cry out in ecstasy as Lust snuck a hand down the front of your pants, clearly aroused from just watching you.

“DO YOU THINK THEY’LL BE LONG, COMIC? I HAVEN’T HAD A TURN YET, AND I’M SO PUMPED! I’VE BEEN DOING SOME READING, AND I REALLY THINK THEY’LL LIKE SOME OF THE THINGS I DUG UP!”

Comic cast him an amused look, but almost immediately looked back to you, shifting in place and palming his erect cock through his pants. Yeah… you looked damn good with your mouth around a dick.

He’d have to grab a piece of that himself…

“does your brother know you’ve been reading romance novels, blue?”

Blueberry flushed, but huffed and folded his arms, also watching, with a great deal of intrigue and desire, as Lust pulled your pants down your legs further, face buried between your thighs the moment you were bared to him.

“THEY ARE RESEARCH MATERIAL, AND FAR BETTER AND MORE APPROPRIATE THAN WHAT HE READS! HE HAS NO ROOM TO JUDGE!”

Comic chuckled, then groaned beneath his breath, gaze on the length of Red’s cock slipping in and out of your lips, how you squirmed against Lust’s tongue.

“stars fuck me… they better not take much longer.”

Blueberry squirmed where he sat, biting the lower prominence of his bony lips and choking on his breath.

“I COULDN’T AGREE MORE… HOLY TORIEL.”

* * *

 


	21. All Kinds Are Welcome

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All are welcome in our den of love~ Except for fuckin' Jerry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *B herself*

silcatian asked: Are monsters and or half monsters allowed in the brothel or is it reserved for humans and...potassium people?

* * *

B opened her arms wide, emerald eyes glittering, and spun in her desk chair to indicate the entire building, exciting Casanova into leaping around the desk beside her.

“All are welcome, dear! We don’t discriminate! We are all one in our thirst for skeletons!” she exclaimed, coming to a stop with a swish of her long curls, then dropped her arms, her smile softening.

“But for a more exact answer, your OCs are more than welcome, eldritch creature, monster, human, alien, or mixed breed. Just no Charas, no Frisks, and NO JERRYS. Okay? Okay~”

* * *

 

**Author's Note:**

> Tell me what you thought, my dears, and leave me a comment. Leave me a request, too, if you desire~ do keep in mind that I am going to be posting works already written first, and that I already have a list of requests. Be patient, take your seat in the lobby... and we will call your name in order <3


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